


Those Key Moments

by sartiebodyshots



Category: Falling Skies
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-05
Updated: 2015-11-05
Packaged: 2018-04-30 03:35:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5148776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sartiebodyshots/pseuds/sartiebodyshots
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hal can pinpoint exactly the moment he realized he was in love with Shaq and the moment that he realized that Shaq loved him too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Those Key Moments

**Author's Note:**

> This is a weird, new style that I haven't really written in a lot (writing in past tense is NOT my favorite when it comes to prose), so if you have Strong Feelings about the style, you should feel free to share, even if they're negative. Altho really, you should always feel free to comment on anything, duh.

Hal can pinpoint the exact moment that he realized was in love with Shaq.  Honestly, it was dumb to fall in love with Shaq- he’s gruff and he’s an alien and he’s all rough edges- but Hal did it anyway.  Total accident, one he regretted when it happened.

The moment, the key moment, that Hal realized he was in love with Shaq happened late one night when everyone else was asleep.  They had been sleeping together for a few months.  Shaq spent a lot of time out of patrol, though, which interfered with their sexing schedule.  So Hal would go out and bother him because sometimes it was hard to sleep without Shaq there.

“I do not understand why you insist on coming out here night after night,” Shaq said.  “It lessens my effectiveness as a guard and you are clearly uncomfortable.”

“I’m not uncomfortable,” Hal said, teeth chattering.  “Yeah, okay, maybe I’m a little uncomfortable, but it’s getting cold.  That’s all.”

“I do not understand why you are out here if you are cold and uncomfortable,” Shaq said.

It was just an offhand comment, but it made Hal stop for a minute.  Why was he out there with some grumpy Volm warrior?  He had a nice warm bed- hell, he had two, considering he could sleep in Shaq’s if he wanted was sex once Shaq got off patrol.  Shaq would wake him up for a sleepy roll in the hay. 

He realized then that he actually cared about Shaq.  Not in the general way that Hal cared about everyone, but in a deeper more meaningful way.  In a love kind of way.  Being around Shaq was enjoyable, even if Shaq was constantly grumpy.  Actually, that was one of the reasons why being around Shaq was so much fun. 

No one said the kind of stuff that Shaq did.  And honestly, Hal was knew that most of it was total bullshit.  Shaq was a puzzle, for sure, but Hal loved figuring him out, and he loved what parts of him he had figured out already.  He even loved the parts of him that he hadn’t figured out yet.

But even then, he knew that he couldn’t just blurt out “I love you.”  Not just because of _Shaq_ , but because the realization came with a twisting, unhappy feeling in the pit of his stomach. 

Either of them could die at any time.  It was war after all. 

More than that, if they both lived, it wasn’t like they were going to get a happily ever after.  Hal knew Shaq well enough to know that he would never leave his people for him.  No matter what.  And Hal already loved him too much to even ask. 

So, with a heavy weight settling in his chest, Hal turned and grinned at Shaq.  “I just like to bother you,” he said, and Shaq just snorted at him.

“If the Espheni come, I am not defending you if it prevents me from doing my duties,” Shaq said as he pressed Hal close to his warm body and Hal stayed there for a while, mulling over the fact that he loved Shaq. 

Another moment that Hal can pinpoint to ridiculous accuracy is the moment he realized that Shaq loved him too.  Sure, he had already known that Shaq liked him, no matter what he might say, but love?  Love is something bigger, not something that Hal would feel comfortable casually declaring someone else felt.

One night, Hal half woke up, disturbed by something shifting on their bed and a low voice murmuring something he couldn’t understand.  He wasn’t awake enough to move much, just enough to half open his eyes when he felt a familiar finger carefully tracing his jaw.

It was hard to see in the dark, but he could see Shaq looking at him.  There was a tenderness there.  A softness that seemed weird on Shaq’s face (A softness that Hal wouldn’t even recognize as softness if he didn’t know Shaq so well) so Hal closed his eyes so Shaq wouldn’t know he saw. 

_Oh god_ , Hal remembers thinking as he fell back asleep, _leaving is going to hurt him, too_ because just because Shaq loved him didn’t mean he would ever consider staying on Earth after they’d kicked the Espheni off the planet.  Not if Hal asked, not if Hal begged. 

By then he knew that Cochise would stay on Earth for Dad; hell, if Dad died, Cochise would stay on Earth for him and his brothers.  That Cochise would stay and Shaq would go never really bothered Hal.  He knew it had nothing to do with how much the both of them loved, but more to do with how they felt about loving.  Hal was pretty sure that Cochise had been looking for someone like Dad- someone he could love- his whole life, as corny as it sounded.

 But Shaq accidentally fell in love; it wasn’t anything he ever wanted, and Hal knew that.  All Shaq wanted was to be a model Volm warrior.  Shaq’s affection for Hal was a lapse in his otherwise perfection Volm-ness.  His true commitment would always be to his people, just like Hal would always put his brothers before Shaq. 

Hal also realized then that he couldn’t even jokingly tell Shaq that he loved him.  Because it would actually mean something to Shaq, even if he never admitted it.  Even if he never even realized it.  It would affect Shaq.

This meant Shaq was going to leave him, leave Earth, and never know that Hal loved him; it wasn’t like Shaq could ever pick something so subtle up on his own. 

The thought of Shaq leaving but never knowing that he’s loved twists Hal up inside.  He carries it with him into battle.  He carries it with him into bed, where Shaq keeps him warm on cold nights with gentle care (and not just in a sexual way), even if he insists there are many more important things he could be doing. 

It’s a silly thing for Hal to get caught up on; it’s not like Shaq would ever tell him he loves him back, and it’s not like Hal needs to hear it, either.  Hal knows that Shaq loves him with certainty, and that knowing means more than words ever could, especially considering how often Shaq says love is a stupid, human thing that Volm could never engage in. 

But there’s a human, selfish part of him that wants Shaq to know that he’s loved because it seems so important to Hal.  And there’s no one else to love Shaq but Hal, Hal is sure of it from what both Shaq and Cochise have said about Volm society. 

It’s a stark contrast to Hal, who is loved by his brothers, by his dad, by his mom even if she’s gone now, by his alien stepdad, by Weaver, by people too numerous to count.  So even if Shaq truly didn’t love him, Hal would still have plenty of love.

But Shaq just has him, and Shaq can never know it because he’s going to leave once the war is over.  It’s something that Hal tries not to think about too often.  Better to keep on loving Shaq, giving him something to take along when he leaves. 

Even when Dad sets off that massive weapon and destroys the Espheni on Earth, even when they get the intel that Dad has destroyed all Espheni everywhere, Hal still has that terrible twisted feeling inside when he thinks about how much he loves Shaq (and his love for Shaq has only deepened over time, which is kind of ridiculous because Shaq is such a big grump).  He still can’t tell him.

If Hal couldn’t ask Shaq to stay on Earth and leave a war, there’s no way he can ask him to stay on Earth now that he can finally go to the home that his people have fought and died to reclaim for centuries.  That would just be cruel. 

Hal is surprised when Shaq doesn’t leave with the first batch of Volm warriors or with the second.  He keeps expecting to wake up to find himself alone in bed, but it doesn’t happen.  Every morning Shaq is there.

After a month, almost all the Volm are gone.  Some new Volm come to Earth- setting up diplomatic relations, apparently- but most of the warriors that had been stationed on Earth have left for the Volm homeworld.  But Shaq doesn’t leave.

That Shaq is still here is almost irritating.  Why hasn’t he left yet?  The sooner Shaq leaves, the sooner Hal can figure out how to deal with that. 

One day, Hal screws up the courage to ask Shaq when they’re having lunch together.  He tries to pass it off as casually as he possibly can. 

“So, uh, when are you going to the Volm homeworld?” Hal asks. 

“I am not,” Shaq says. 

“Wait, what?” Hal asks, heart racing.  “Where are you going, then?”

If Shaq signed up to go off and fight in some other war, Hal will murder him.  Honestly.

“I thought after we ate we could visit the shooting range,” Shaq says.  “While the war is over, I wish to maintain my skills.  You may require protection in the future.”

“I mean, where are you going after you leave Earth?” Hal asks. 

“I am not leaving Earth.  I am remaining here,” Shaq says.

“What?” Hal says.

“I am remaining on Earth,” Shaq says, slowly and loudly.  “Is it your ears or your brain that has been damaged?”

Hal throws a bit of his sandwich at Shaq.  “You’re staying on Earth?!  Permanently?”

“Of course,” Shaq says.  “My commanding officer remains on Earth, so I will remain.”

“What the hell?  Why didn’t you tell me?” Hal yells, heart racing.

“I believed Chichauk already informed you that he would remain,” Shaq says.

Hal can’t believe that Shaq is staying on Earth and didn’t tell him.  It’s been a month, and they’ve spent almost all their time together, and Shaq neglected to mention that he wasn’t leaving. 

“You’re terrible!  You’re an asshole!” Hal yells, getting up and coming around to Shaq’s side of the table so he can shove him properly.  “How could not tell me?”

“You want me to leave the planet?” Shaq asks, looking up at him and there’s a little bit of hurt there.

“No!” Hal yells, shoving Shaq again.  “I want you to stay here with me!” 

“Then why are you so upset?  Or is this a new way to show affection?” Shaq asks, standing up.

“I’ve been so worried about you leaving and you just don’t tell me you’re staying!  God, Shaq,” Hal says, pushing Shaq again, but this time somehow ending up snuggled against his chest.  “You’re an idiot!”

“And yet you are still in close physical proximity to me,” Shaq says smugly.

Hal glares up at him, the full weight of Shaq staying on Earth settling over him.  He won’t have to get over Shaq.  They can be together for as long as they both want to be. 

Hal can tell him.

“It’s because I love you, you jackass,” Hal says, pulling Shaq down to kiss him hard.

“Humans are so confusing,” Shaq says, touching his cheek gently.  “So foolish.”

“You love me, too,” Hal says, feeling giddy now.  He’s in _love_ , and they’re going to stay together.  They’re going to be together and the thought makes him laugh because he had never expected this.  “We love each other!”

“I believe you are delirious,” Shaq says, making a disapproving noise.  “Volm do not love; that is a foolish human emotion.”

“Whatever you say, babe,” Hal says, snuggled close to Shaq.  “You’re just a heartless Volm warrior, I know.”

“No,” Shaq says quietly.  “I am not a Volm warrior anymore.  There is no more war to fight.” 

And he sounds defeated and almost scared.

“Hey,” Hal says, smiling up at him.  “You’ll figure something out.  We’ll figure something out.”

“I suppose, as I am to remain on this planet, it is most sensible to remain with those I know,” Shaq says. 

Hal snorts and slips his hand into Shaq’s.  “I love you.”

It feels so good to say it. 

“There is no way to stop you from feeling such a foolish emotion,” Shaq says.  “Although I request that you refrain from saying so where other Volm can hear your foolishness.”

“Deal,” Hal says, squeezing his hand.

Shaq loves him, and he loves Shaq.  And now Shaq knows that he’s loved. 

They can build a life together now.  It won’t be easy or simple (and he is probably going to spend a lot of time being very annoyed), but Hal is so happy that they’re going to get to do it.  He never would have guessed it was possible back when they first started having sex, when he had the terrifying realization that he loved Shaq, or when he had the even more terrifying realization that Shaq loved him. 


End file.
